Giving thanks? Hardly!

2007-11-06T18:56:00.000-08:00

What is the Thanksgiving ritual about? In our hearts, it is meant to illicit feelings of joyous family intimacy, stewardship, and love. We should come to a Thanksgiving dinner with the expectancy that all grudges will be lain aside for a few fleeting hours. We should enjoy the foods we love to eat with a group of people we wish we could be around at all times; alas, we should say, that this glorious event comes only once a year.

The above idealism is, for most families, a crock of absolute shit. The reality is that most of us spend our Thanksgiving either paying too much for food we certainly will eat only on this one day of the year, or else gluttonously consuming immoderate amounts of it. The smell of dry turkey and burnt rolls permeates what little air is left in the cramped dining room. Several hours are lost listening to the drudgery of people we know either too well or too little of to care about. Very few topics are allowed due to the hogtied, censored nature of our tabletop conversations. Honesty is in short supply: we give insincere compliments, misleading smiles, inaudible grunts, napkin-hidden regurgitation, and ill-conceived advice, all under the false banner of family union.

The antagonist of this story is tradition, a foul beast which forces structure upon an event which is supposed to be a time of unrestrained enjoyment. It is unfortunate that so few (if any) have broken the mold and turned the holiday into something that is more representative of its philanthropic intentions. In fact, I have yet to meet a member of any family who talks about Thanksgiving while smiling with anticipation. It's high time we learn to make the most of this gathering of disjointed individuals, or else begin inviting our close friends in their stead.

Veritas! Aequitas! Etcetera!

Giving thanks? Hardly!